I almost lost my wife and son. Now, he's 2. And I just wrote him a book.
Christ forged allegiant faith through fire.
Todayโs the big day! I just released my first book, The Atheist Conversion Manual. The Kindle edition is available, paperback and hardcover release 7/20. Iโve been talking about it all week on X and Substack, but I never told you the story behind it.
I wrote it for a son I almost lost.
Some of you have already heard this story because I shared it in an email a while ago. I decided it needs to be an article to help you understand that anything I write for you, from books, to articles, to emails, to notes, is personal at the deepest level.
Allegiant Faith Network emerged from the intense pressures of a trying test no one prepared me for. One that almost shattered meโฆ
My wife became pregnant with our son in September of 2023. We tried to make a big deal by keeping it a secret to surprise my family at Christmas.
But because of fibroids in her womb, she started to show right away. It was still a great celebration, just not a surprise.
The only reason that December in 2023 is worth mentioning is because it was the last happy time before everything went cratering downhill.
Her pregnancy was difficult. The usual sleepless nights and cravings were exacerbated by rashes, horrid hot flashes, a cage-fight with natal diabetes (this one was the worst because my wife HATES needles and had to take insulin), and constant worry her fibroids took up too much room for our son to develop.
Turns outโฆour worries were justified.
8 weeks before he was due, she started having contractions. We thought they were Braxton-Hicks. Those intrepid pranksters that make you think the babyโs on the way. After all, her due date wasnโt until late June.
Then, she lost her mucus plug.
She panicked because she wasnโt sure what was happening. And since we both didnโt know, we bet on a basic trip to the doctor.
I comforted and reassured her that everything would be fine. My reassurance ended up being like Mr. Incredible in The Incredibles saying, โWeโre superheroes. What could happen?โ
Everything turned out fineโฆbut we would walk through the fire first.
Her mom took her to the hospital while I stayed behind since one of our dogs had a vet appointment, and what we thought would be a simple checkup turned into the longest weekend of our livesโฆ
When I finally made it to the hospital and got everything arranged with family to keep the dogs taken care of, the house in order, and whatever else was necessary, they had my wife and mother-in-law set up in a room, gave her a magnesium bolus shot, and set her up on a magnesium drip with a liquid diet.
They also gave her steroids to help the babyโs lungs develop.
Labor had started. WAY too early.
The doctors and nurses told us they would do everything they could to reduce contractions. And it workedโฆfor a time.
But after midnight April 15, 2024, they picked up again. Febrile monsters on a rampage. And thatโs when I panicked (hey, nobodyโs perfect), called her mom to get back to the hospital, and let my family know their grandson was probably on the way.
The deal sealed when the doctor came in later that morning and tried to do a uterine exam. See what was going on. And her water broke like flood torrents from a shattered dam.
My baby boy was coming whether the world was ready or not.
His arm in the canal. Emergency C-section. NICU.
Nothing makes you ready for the unthinkableโฆ
Everything from that moment flew past as if we were in a hundred-meter sprint.
Operating room. Bright white lights. Slice. Little bit of a fight (he didnโt want to come out that way, apparently). Shrill cries. Couple pictures.
He was alive, but his right arm was swollen like a purple balloon from trying to enter reality wrong.
32 weeks, jaundiced, lungs underdeveloped, and only 3 pounds. They wouldnโt let us hold him except for the brief photos we took because he had to be rushed down to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU).
Where he would spend the next 8 weeks.
By the time he was secured in his new temporary living space, surrounded by great nurses we would come to know as friends, I was an emotional wreck.
Exhausted. Confused. Worried. Thirsty.
Every inch of me covered in a thorough blanket of sweat.
Eventually, someone collected me and guided my frail soul up to where my wife was recovering from surgery (โI thought you said she almost diedโ?โ Just wait), and just seeing her face and knowing it was over made me slump into the chair beside her bed, a jittery mess.
It took three days for her to heal and re-cooperate. During that time, we learned she had almost bled out on the table.
The two smallest fibroids in her womb were right over where our son was positioned, so they had to be removed. Her surgeons used up 5 units of blood to keep her alive. It was a literal brush with death.
I almost went home a widower.
Many today would use this opportunity to tell you, โDonโt have kids.โ And theyโre absolute idiots.
Because I wouldnโt trade anything I went through for the world. Hereโs whyโฆ
That terrible day two years ago was my forge.
What wouldโve still been one of the happiest days of my life became so much more because of the trial I faced. And whenever I look at my son, instead of remorse, Iโm overwhelmed by joy and reminded of the immeasurable grace God shows us in this fallen world.
You see, even though I believed in and followed Jesus, it was merely through obligation. I wrote because the Bible called me to. I obeyed because thatโs what weโre supposed to do.
But there was little investment. Little order. Little focus.
On 4/15/2024, I went from carefree, careless child of God to a man with purpose. From timid Chris to Courageous Chris.
A spark ignited me into high gear and inspired the ministry you see before you today. This little spark:
Weโve gotten too used to comfort in this world. Itโs made us weak. Because diamonds are forged through intense pressure.
If you never go through battles, youโll never gain the resolve of a soldier.
People want to balk at God, spit in his face, crucify him because he lets evil โrun amok.โ But where does that get us?
God hates evil as much as you do. He despises it. Never wanted this reality for us. But he didnโt let sin and death into the world. We did. To eradicate it would be to eradicate us. To bring good from itโฆTHAT restores greatness and glory in ways we canโt even imagine!
And you donโt realize it until you feel the pain.
So, a word of advice: Embrace the storm.
You may cry, you may get confused, you may collapse in a chair by a bedside a total wreck, wondering what the heck is going onโฆbut if youโre available to be forged in fire by God Most High, nothing can stop you.
I love you, friends.
Get a copy of my new book, The Atheist Conversion Manual, and help support Allegiant Faith Network here:
Itโs not like most books that defend the Christian faith. I take you through my story from darkness to light and use that story as the frame to explore evidence for the existence of God and his identity as Christ Jesus, our Lord.
Hereโs what early readers are saying:
โThis is one of those books you pick up to flip through just to see what it's all about and end up reading it for an hour straight. It's a well-thought-out, well-researched manual packed with relevant, easy-to-follow information.โ
โThe Atheist Conversion Manual is a no-nonsense approach to defending truth. It presents a compelling case for Christianity using the classical apologetics method in a way that is practical, engaging, and easy to understand.โ
โWhen I need material for the purpose of solving or addressing any kind of problem, I value and respect most an author who has had to actually do it. This book and its author, fit that exactly.โ
โChris writes apologetics the way it should be written: plain language, real stakes, and a testimony that earns the argument.โ
โChris Wright wrote the book I wish I'd read years ago when I was an atheist.โ
Because Iโve been through the fire. I know whatโs at stake. And I want you to know too, so you can become a fearless soldier Christ your King and build his kingdom on earth as it is in heaven.
(P.S. Allegiant Faith paid subscribers will receive their own personal copy later today, 7/18.)