The Cult of Self
Understanding the Modern Identity Crisis
Social media is full of selfies, endless talk about “living your truth,” and a constant chorus encouraging you to “put yourself first.” You might think it’s just a modern trend, part of the digital age.
But beneath the surface, something deeper is happening. The cult of self is shaping the way we see ourselves, our relationships, and society in ways we rarely stop to consider.
Why It Matters
The cult of self may promise happiness and freedom, but it leaves us emptier than ever. With a focus on self-indulgence and a rejection of larger truths (moral, spiritual, and scientific), society loses its foundations.
Positions like atheism trumpet and promote the self, but they never provide unwitting hearers with the fine print.
When “self” becomes god, community breaks down, truth becomes relative, and our ability to function as productive, compassionate human beings diminishes.
And you find yourself caught in the crossfire.
What Is the “Cult of Self”?
At its core, the “cult of the self” is the modern belief that your own desires, feelings, and personal identity hold the highest authority, ultimate truth, and deepest meaning. We prioritize self over external sources—God, tradition, family, facts—for purpose and direction.
Involved are the powerful social narratives swirling around us—encouraging us to define ourselves, pursue our personal fulfillment, and “be true to ourselves,” at any cost. The self (and its wishes) is sacred, and external sources of meaning must step aside.
How Does It Claim Victims?
Anyone with children knows we start our life thinking we’re the center of the universe. The job of parents is to peacefully and patiently purge that mindset from their children, so they become functional social humans.
But today’s culture reinforces selfishness from all directions:
- Social media rewards self-presentation and status updates.
- Advertisers promise happiness if you just buy what you want.
- Schools and media culture assure us that personal identity and feelings are most important.
- Psychology and self-help advice place personal happiness and fulfillment as the chief good.
It sounds harmless. Don’t we need self-esteem and confidence?
There’s a big difference between healthy self-respect and turning the self into a shrine. Over time, the “me first” approach crowds out everything else and humanity suffers.
The Cycle of Self-Obsession
Below are the steps leading to self-obsession:
1. Identity Crisis: We’re told to search for our “true self,” which leads to constant self-questioning. Who am I? Why am I unhappy? Maybe I just need to change.
2. Chasing Feelings: We look for happiness in new identities, experiences, and pleasures. But the more we chase happiness, the more it eludes us.
3. Social Comparison: Social media becomes a battleground for attention and validation. If others find me likable, then I must be good.
4. Isolation and Anxiety: When personal fulfillment remains out of reach, it leads to loneliness, frustration, even despair. Victims become stuck in self-made delusions that dismantle and destroy from the inside out.
5. Defensiveness: Any external voice—family, church, even reality itself—that challenges our self-concept is oppressive.
When anxieties arise, we seek solace within. Narcissism erodes mental capacity to where you can’t understand, comprehend, or function without filtering your thoughts through the lens of self-obsession.
Strategies for Breaking the Cycle
Here are some solutions offered by great minds throughout history:
1. Look Beyond Yourself
Meaning and purpose exist outside the boundaries of our own hearts. Faith, service to others, and engagement with something bigger than ourselves—family, God, or community—offer a sense of belonging and rootedness.
2. Resist the Lure of Social Media as Your “Mirror”
It’s great to connect online, but don’t let numbers of likes or followers define your value. Step away from endless self-comparison and present yourself authentically, not just as a brand.
3. Practice Self-Sacrifice
Ironically, self-worth comes from giving yourself away: loving your neighbor, caring for your family, supporting your faith community and other communities.
4. Embrace Hard Truths
Facing uncomfortable external realities can ground you when the “self” is spinning out. Truth matters and is not subjective.
5. Find Accountability
Tightknit bonds with like-minded people keep us grounded. It’s in a community with shared values—even messy ones—that we discover how to function best for all.
Where the Journey Leads
If you find yourself stuck in cycles of self-absorption, don’t panic. It’s human. Selfishness isn’t the end of your story.
It’s okay to be broken. It’s not okay to stay broken.
For Christians especially, our obligation is not happiness as the world wants us to believe. Pursuit of pleasure only produces pain.
Holiness is the source of freedom. Imitating the perfection of the Savior.
Step out. Look upward. We hold the answer everyone seeks. The embodiment of truth and life dwelt among us, sacrificing his own life for ours. He orders us to do likewise.